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How to Rediscover a Meaningful Connection with Your Partner

When you have been together for a while, it’s easy to get “comfortable.” You each have your daily routines and interests. Of course, you both love each other.

Yet, that connection that you first had when you were dating has changed. The passion that you each felt has tempered a little over the years.

Of course, that doesn’t mean you both don’t still love each other. However, it might feel more difficult now to feel connected.

If this is a problem for your relationship, there are ways to rediscover a meaningful connection with your partner.

Here are some ideas to consider.

Spend Time Together Every Day

Before you say, “I’m already booked every day!”, think about this for a moment. In order to have a meaningful connection, you have to spend time being with each other. There’s no other way around it.

Why? Because time together means opportunities to share thoughts, ideas, laughs, and other things. Of course, that doesn’t mean you need to spend 6-8 hours with each other every day to make this happen.

Some ideas for spending time together are, for example:

  • Dedicating 30 minutes or so at the start or end of each day to be together. Share coffee in the morning, or drink tea in the evening.
  • Eating lunch together! Is it possible to arrange your schedules so that you can meet up for lunch during the day? That gives you an extra hour a week to connect.
  • Maximizing weekends by spending a longer stretch of time in each others’ company.

Having different lengths of together-time spread over the week will help to lay the groundwork of rediscovering a meaningful connection with one another.

Become Experts at Resolving Conflicts

Every relationship has conflict. Yet, that doesn’t mean that conflict has to drive you both apart. Couples who are skilled at navigating and resolving conflict will be better able to stay connected.

Note that this is not a skill that occurs overnight. It takes time to master conflict management skills. And that process might involve a few bumps in the road for your relationship.

However, as both of you practice and refine those skills, conflicts don’t have as much of an impact anymore. If you quickly resolve relationship issues, then you can both put it behind you and move forward together.

Have Fun Together

When you have fun with anyone, you feel more relaxed and at ease. You have a common bond that is shared through something you do together. This applies to friendships, family, and your partner as well.

So to rediscover a meaningful relationship with your partner, do something fun together! Use the scheduling ideas mentioned above to build fun into your week.

It may seem a little ridiculous, scheduling fun, but we do live in an overly-scheduled world (which is decidedly not fun!). Accept the situation for what it is, and build fun into your week. Maybe it’s relaxing at home for movie night or going on an adventure on Saturday. There are lots of ways to factor fun into your relationship.

Rekindling Intimacy

No discussion about rediscovering a meaningful connection with your partner can happen without talking about intimacy.

Many couples often turn to therapy because the passion and spark that they once felt in the bedroom are gone. This is often due to partners having different levels of desire for sex, which in turn causes conflict. For example, one partner wants to have sex more often, while the other does not.

Couples can examine this issue and try to find common ground. Which includes discovering that intimacy doesn’t equal sex!

There is no one single solution to rediscovering meaning and connection in your relationship. Rather, it potentially requires addressing multiple issues that could be affecting your connection with each other. That’s why it’s important for couples to ask for help and consult with a therapist who understands relationship counseling.

If you would like help with reconnecting or relighting the spark in your relationship, why not call / text us 256-686-9195.

 

 

Author

Joshua Howell, MS, LPC, NCC, AADC, ICAADC, SAP, SAE

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